Tuesday, October 03, 2006
RETIREMENT IN TUCSON ESTATES
Life in Tucson Estates.
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A little old lady was sitting on a park bench in Tucson Estates. A man walked over and sits down on the other end of the bench.
After a few moments, the woman asks, "Are you a stranger here?" "No", he replies, "I lived here years ago."
"So, where were you all these years?"
"In prison," he says. "Why did they put you in prison?"
He looked at her, and very quietly said, "I killed my wife."
"Oh!" said the woman. "So you're single..."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * *
A man was telling his neighbor in Tucson Estates , "I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect."
"Really," answered the neighbor. "What kind is it?"
"Twelve thirty."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * * * * *
Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor at the Tucson EstatesMedical Clinic to get a physical. A few days after the doctor saw Morris at Cactus Cards with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you?"
"Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful,' Morris replied.
To which doctor said, "I didn't say that, Morris. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur and Be careful!'"
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
A little old man shuffled slowly into "Jan's Place", an ice creamparlor at Tucson Estates, and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath he ordered a banana split.
The waitress asked kindly,! "Crushed nuts?"
"No," he replied, "arthritis!"
================
A little old lady was sitting on a park bench in Tucson Estates. A man walked over and sits down on the other end of the bench.
After a few moments, the woman asks, "Are you a stranger here?" "No", he replies, "I lived here years ago."
"So, where were you all these years?"
"In prison," he says. "Why did they put you in prison?"
He looked at her, and very quietly said, "I killed my wife."
"Oh!" said the woman. "So you're single..."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * *
A man was telling his neighbor in Tucson Estates , "I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect."
"Really," answered the neighbor. "What kind is it?"
"Twelve thirty."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * * * * *
Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor at the Tucson EstatesMedical Clinic to get a physical. A few days after the doctor saw Morris at Cactus Cards with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you?"
"Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful,' Morris replied.
To which doctor said, "I didn't say that, Morris. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur and Be careful!'"
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
A little old man shuffled slowly into "Jan's Place", an ice creamparlor at Tucson Estates, and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath he ordered a banana split.
The waitress asked kindly,! "Crushed nuts?"
"No," he replied, "arthritis!"
